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Wednesday, August 14, 2002
One of my earliest posts was a disagreement with Steven denBeste concerning the effects of a treaty the terms of which violate the constitution. My only excuse is that I was young and stupid.

OK, my only excuse was that I was stupid.

Today, I again fearlessly venture into the wild to test my wits against that same Titan of the Web. But this time, I'm going to be really smart about it. I'm not going to use my name. Remember, you didn't hear it here first. OK, here we go:

In discussing the deferral of the disagreement in the UN between the EU and the US about immunity from prosecution (in the International Criminal Court) for US peacekeepers, den Beste notes:

[T]he EU has asked that any nation requesting membership in the EU not make ... an agreement with the US [to grant immunity from such prosecution to US peacekeepers] until after the EU comes up with an overall policy on the issue.

He later concludes that [i]f one of these nations [we ask to enter into such an agreement] comes to need our help, ultimately they will have to agree to this no matter what the EU says. Of course, they could always ask the EU to help defend them against armed invasion instead of us, and the EU could deploy its army of bureaucrats from Brussels, using their much-feared ferocious glowering at the invaders.

It is that last phrase that draws my ire. It has been well established that the Krupp FGG-19 is the finest ferocious glower generator made in the world today. These aircraft mounted generators can ferociously glower at high power in a "footprint" seventy meters wide from an altitude above ground of one hundred meters. Once in flight, this remarkable weapon is capable of making the difference not only in any single engagement, but an entire campaign. Test flights over Paris have conclusively demonstrated that the once the glowerers have ferociously glowered at the glowerees for a total of 1.75 ferocious glowers, the will to oppose any threat of violence is reduced by 82.74%, regardless of the nature or source of the threat.

Experiments with the less expensive technology of painting a frowny face on the lower surfaces of an aircraft have also been planned. Those experiments include varying the size and placement of the frowny face and changing the color of the aircraft from grey to both camouflage green and solid pink. Additionally, despite fierce political opposition, enhancements to the existing technology are in the works, including the thermobaric ferocious glowerer, which, experts predict, will be able to ferociously glower around corners and into underground bunkers covered by as much as three inches of course gravel. However, both the planned enhancements and the new trials had to be delayed until a new test range is located. Paris was deemed to no longer be a suitable test range when it was discovered that Jacques Chirac had ceded the Louvre and Versailles to the first pre-teen he saw with a soccer ball after receiving a complaint from an eight year old boy that the neighborhood bully had stolen his ball.

Incredibly, den Beste simply ignores the well known capabilities of this proven and devastating technology. The argumentum no-see-um is no more than a well known debating tactic, the use of which does not measure up to den Beste's usual impeccable standards.

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