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Monday, September 16, 2002
Jesse Jackson speaks.
Surgeons called to remove foot from mouth.

The Rev. Jesse Jackson yesterday told about 600 Michigan State University students that America's democracy was 37 years old, not 200-plus, and that "democracy as we know it did not begin in Philadelphia, where a bunch of white men wrote the laws."

These men's wives were not allowed [to vote], these laws were made at a time when only white men had the right to vote," Mr. Jackson said, noting that the Voting Rights Act of 1965 was the commencement of "true democracy."

Shall I point out that we've never had a true democracy in the United States? It's a republic, doofus. And which of those dead white mens' laws do you object to? The one that says "All men are created equal"? Or maybe the one about not restricting speech, which allows you to pass off your verbal vomitus as somehow profound or well thought out? Or maybe the Civil War Amendments (Twelve through Fourteen) that those dead white men adopted after our bloodiest war led by a white man, fought almost entirely by white men? Or did history really begin only after more white men lived up to to those earlier pronouncements by passing the Civil Rights Act (which was signed into law by a TEXAN, also a white man)? The fact that white men passed the laws means that they must be bad, so which ones are bad, Jesse? Tell me, please. I want to know.

Speaking at the Jack Breslin Student Events Center, Mr. Jackson also used his platform at what organizers called a "Rally for Peace" to continue his criticism of Republican leaders, focusing on President Bush.

Courtesy of VodkaPundit, may I recommend Masturbate for Peace? Their motto (as proposed by Brian in VodkaMan's comments and applied to Jackson): It's sex with someone you love.

Any military action in Iraq, [Jackson] said, at this point would violate U.N. and international law.

Oh, you mean that "law" that no one except the US is supposed to pay any attention to?

But Mr. Bush says, 'All right, I'll go to the U.N.,' then he tells them that unless you follow me, I'll call off trade with your country," said Mr. Jackson, a frequent critic of the administration.

No, he said "Stand up and do what you said you'd do when you passed those sixteen resolutions, and if you don't, the US will, because the alternative (doing nothing) is too dangerous."

America is a great nation," Mr. Jackson continued.

Well, that's progress, of a sort.

But we only represent 6 percent of the world.

What percentage of the world's population lives in Iraq? I know there's a point in here somewhere. I'm sure I'll find it eventually. Looking ... looking... Well maybe later.

English is a great language but it is a minority language. Jesus didn't speak it.

That's right! He got one right! Way to go Jesse. Jesus spoke Hebrew (I assume) or Latin (unlikely). Does that mean that any idea initially expressed by someone using something other than Hebrew or Latin is automatically a bad idea? Hmmm. Jackson's speech was in (wait for it) English! Well, sort of. Jackson has been challenged by English for some time now. God knows, I find it difficult to understand his words. Maybe he means that the ideas of anyone who doesn't speak Jacksonian English are bad. Is Jacksonian English like Hebrew?

We are a great nation, but we have to be of service, we do not have to be superior.

Come again? We are a great nation. So far, so good. I'm with you, Jesse.

From great

Very large in size. No, he can't mean this one. After all, 6% isn't too large.

Larger in size than others of the same kind. See above.

Large in quantity or number. See above.

Extensive in time or distance. Maybe this one makes sense in Jacksonspeak, but not in English. Oops, I forgot, English = bad.

Remarkable or outstanding in magnitude, degree, or extent. This is it!

Of outstanding significance or importance. Or maybe this.

Chief or principal: the great house on the estate. Jackson can't mean we are the nation among all nations. This one's out.

Superior in quality or character; noble. Another good candidate. Oh, I forgot. We are great, but we can't be superior. Sorry.

Powerful; influential. And another.

Eminent; distinguished. And yet another.

Grand; aristocratic. I don't think this is what he meant.

Did anyone see "serve" or "service" in there? Did I miss something? Did anyone see anything in any of those definitions that might possibly be applicable that did not include the concept of superiority?

Most people on this globe are yellow, black or brown, non-Christian, female, young, poor and don't speak English."

That, of course, means that the opinions of anyone who is not yellow, black, brown, non-Christian, female, young, and poor or who speaks English are not worthy of consideration. This is supposed to be from a man opposed to racism and sexism? The quality of one's thoughts are derived directly from the color of your skin, your native language or your sex chromosomes? If he didn't mean that, what did he mean? He's not leaving much wiggle room.

Mr. Jackson made the stop here as he returned home to Chicago from a Friday rally in Washington to protest the Bush administration's policy of investigating and detaining people. He accused Mr. Bush of wanting to "rule the world."

As opposed to Jesse, who merely wants to rule American businesses, and then only to the extent of causing them to pony up some bucks to avoid a very public charge of racism followed months later by a very private withdrawal of the charge. Thanks, I'll stick with Dubya. At least I can vote him out of office if I need to.

The event here was poorly attended after student organizers predicted a crowd of 6,000. The group provided 2,000 free tickets to students and booked the arena area of the center, which has a capacity of 15,000.

Hey, maybe there is hope, after all.

Mr. Jackson was also targeted by a group of protesters, who said that Mr. Jackson is not the person on whom to spend university funds. About a half-dozen students stood outside the Breslin Center under a hand-carried sign that read "Jesse Jackson Protest Squad."

"To bring Jesse Jackson, a left-wing extremist, to this campus to talk about peace, is not what we need," said Craig Burgers, who chairs the Michigan State University chapter of Young Americans for Freedom. "He represents political corruption at its finest."

He noted that Mr. Jackson's speech was supposed to be about peace.

I don't know much about YAF. I'll have to check them out later, since this post is too long already. For the time being, I'll take what solace I can in the fact that the speech was poorly attended despite the availability of 2000 free tickets.

Mr. Jackson holds an honorary doctorate from the university, where he spoke at graduation commencement in 1988.

I wonder if MSU has ever regretted that award over the last 14 or 15 years.

In his hourlong speech yesterday, Mr. Jackson also noted that the United States has a history of supporting political despots.

"We supported the shah of Iran, and we drove the Islamic revolution into being," Mr. Jackson said. "They saw us as allies of oppression. We supported the Taliban we gave $6 million to the Taliban.

Six mill? Wow. Mostly food aid, I would imagine. I wonder how that compares to what we've given to to Afghanistan since the Taliban got the boot.

The Taliban was our ally until September 11."

Hardly. And in any event, what is your conclusion, Jesse? That 9/11 was our fault? Of course. We deserved it, since we are white and speak English. And don't forget that Kosovo and Kuwait both begin with "K." You know what that means. We only supported the muslims there because their countries had the same initials as the KKK.

Mr. Jackson also disparaged the nation's economic order, using the university's labor force as an example.

Would that be the same economic order that has provided Jackson with a fine living for the past 40 years based entirely on his relatively short term association with a man (Martin Luther King) for whom I have a great deal of respect?

You see them out there every day, planting flowers, keeping the place clean," he said. "But they are the working poor. And the cost of a loaf of bread is the same for them as it is for anyone else."

To each according to his needs, from each according to his means, eh Jesse? Sorry, I thought the economic implosion of the USSR established pretty conclusively that this particular economic model doesn't work. Oh, and if they really are the working poor and have food stamps, Jesse, the cost of a loaf of bread is lower for them than is it for me.

If you feel so bad for them, why not go outside and give them a hand? As much as I dislike Jimmy Carter, at least he does that. Or better yet, go outside and tell them you've got them covered and they should take the day off. Or even better than that, stay away from MSU and avoid making a mess for them to clean up in the first place.

Then they can lose those awful jobs.
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